The return of guilt.
His teacher suggested he stay for lunch today: I had been planning that he would stay for lunch and nap. He WILL stay for lunch and nap, but now I feel terrible. I am a bad mother.
I am back to wishing that I could take both my children home and smother myself with them.
I am aware that as they get older, their need for me decreases (so, by working, I wasn't there as much in the early years when they needed me most.)
And the third culture literature book? It ate my summer and meant that Clara and Winton have had a mere 10 days vacation over the whole stretch.
Guilt Guilt Guilt Guilt.
And some more Guilt.