Doesn't matter how nice the day is, driving to work without people--small, talkative (frequently annoying) people-- in the back feels like a vast emptiness.
However! It IS a nice day, and there are 16 minutes before class and I am already ready (Oh the luxury of time!), and I've had a very nice morning (barring missing the kids). Indeed I had a nice evening yesterday too. The result of the nice evening and morning is that I'm at work today and I don't feel utterly unhinged: that's novel. I like it very much. I feel like I could have a conversation with someone today and not delve into either craziness or weepiness (or at least not immediately). That's all VERY good indeed.
And yesterday afternoon involved a visit to the duck pond with the kids (who found a dead koi and enthusiastically pummeled it with a stick), a bike ride with the kids, and a dinner that featured chicken cooked in tomato sauce and a lot of red wine.
Empirically, objectively, even in terms of scheduling: Life is good. The kids are fine. I am fine. There is much, a great deal, to be happy about.
In the great guilt-fest question, "OMG but how can I be a good Mom if I am not there every second of every day? Or of every night?," one answer might be that being a less-worked up and guilt- ravaged mom, a mom more able to enjoy the sunshine, would be being the best Mom I can be right now.